I'm going to take the high road and avoid any tasteless jokes about actual players in linking to this story. You're welcome.
Elephant Throws Out First Pitch
Not only was Friday's pitch thrown by an elephant, but the ball went straight to catcher Chris Robinson's mitt.
Fans and players cheered the 9-foot (2.7-meter)-tall, four-ton African elephant named Laura after she flipped the ball high and wide.
"I've never caught an elephant before," Robinson told The Grand Rapids Press. "She had pretty good life on her fastball. It tailed a little bit."